myangelhascerebralpalsy.com

You Might Be An A-Hole If…

Friday afternoon, I found myself in a parking lot where there were three handicapped parking spots, none of which were available because three cars without placards or plates were parked there. I was picking Phoenix up and was in particular need of a space close by because both his walker and his wheelchair would need to be packed in. I could feel the adrenaline start to flow as I pulled up and blocked the first vehicle. Rolling down my passenger window, I yanked the placard from my rearview mirror, waved it at the lady in space #1. “Do you have one of these?” She didn’t acknowledge me. Didn’t even have the balls to make eye contact. I got out of my car and marched toward her. Aggressively, I waved it at her again. “Do you have one of these?” She said, “I used to…but it doesn’t appear that there is anything wrong with your legs.”

What do you think happened next? It went a little something like this.

“My son is in a effing wheelchair and you need to get the eff out of this spot.”

Yep, I dropped a couple F-bombs on some grandma (whose own child is likely on meth) who was picking up her grandkid from Tavan Elementary kindergarten. Way to make friends and influence people, Broyles. Actually, although I wasn’t successful in persuading this bitch to move, the other two offenders picked up my subtle hint and found alternative short-term parking.

I can assure you that this would not happen if I routinely dropped Phoenix off and picked him up after school. Fortunately for me, he takes the bus. The sad thing is, because I’m not there every day to police the situation, people will continue to do it. I’m only gonna be here for a sec. Just in case you are guilty of such reproachable behavior, I’m gonna give you a little common sense lesson or maybe just a kind reminder. Take it from grandma, you don’t want me to school you in a parking lot!

You might be an a-hole if….

1. You park in a handicapped parking spot for just a sec or so you can run in. Here’s the thing. You CAN run in. The person who needs that spot – the one who you have prevented from parking there – would love to have the ability to run. The likelihood is, they can’t. And because you are an a-hole, they have to find another spot. And then there are situations like mine. Because of your ignorance, I have to take my son’s wheelchair out and load him in and out of his chair behind my SUV, where it isn’t as safe. I could even hold up traffic driving by because I’m maneuvering to get him in and out of his wheelchair or walker in the parking lot with cars driving by.

2. You have a placard or a plate because a member of your family is handicapped and you cheat and park in the handicapped spots when that family member isn’t in the car. I don’t do this. I’m not gonna lie – it crosses my mind when a parking lot is super crowded. But I don’t do it.

3. You take the big handicapped stalls in the dressing rooms because you feel the need to “spread out.” I don’t care if you have a baby in a stroller or a couple kids with you. Unless one of you is handicapped, you don’t have the right. When this happens to me, and it happens all the time at Ross, I usually wait outside that particular stall so the person knows that I know that they are an a-hole. My goal is to shame them into not doing it again.

4. You use the handicapped stall in public bathrooms. I know I’ve done it – usually in airports because I’ve got a lot of luggage. No excuse. Sometimes in small establishments, I’ve noticed that there are only two stalls – and one of them is large and accessible. In this case, don’t go in there if you have major business to do. It is exactly at a time like this when someone in a wheelchair or other assistive device will come in and need to use it.

5. At the movies, you sit in a chair designated for the companion of a disabled person. I’ve kicked people out of these spots before or had an employee do it for me. A-holes usually don’t care so I’ve actually had to get assistance. Really?

The list goes on and on. Public transportation like busses or trains are places you will be put to the test. Rule of thumb here is, if someone is less able-bodied than you, stand up. Be happy that you can.

In closing, it is one thing to be an a-hole. But in most of the cases on the above list, not only are you breaking the law, you are banking some seriously bad karma. Makes me wonder if you will be so able-bodied in your next lifetime?